12
Mar
09

Don’t Sh*t Your Pants

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If this picture and the name of the game doesn’t sell you, I don’t know what will. Hosted on Kongregate, Don’t Sh*t Your Pants claims to be a survival horror game, but is basically a small text adventure.  You’re goal is simple, you have to find a toilet before accidents begin to happen.  Gamers who have played text adventure games will probably figure this one out in a couple of minutes but some might be stumped on how to solve this crafty adventurer.

If you want to avoid help, I would suggest not to read the comments that are posted underneath the game, there are plenty of spoiler words to type in that will help solve this game.  The cool thing about Kongregate is it’s support of achievements, which many of its games has; Don’t Sh*t Your Pants has a total of 9.  If you got some time to kill, head on over here and check out the ridiculous spin on what is considered a retro game.

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12
Mar
09

Quake live is live

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Not ever having played a Quake game in my life, I was somewhat excited to hear that Quake is free and is played through a web browser. The thought of fragging my friends online, for free as well, all located on the quakelive website is perfect for players who never could get into PC FPS’s. This weird news felt like it could have many problems including lagging, server problems, etc. It seems like they have pulled it off though, it plays well and has very few hiccups.
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11
Mar
09

My Addiction to Geometry Wars 2: Retro Evolved

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Very few games on the Xbox Live Arcade can keep me coming back to play them. The game at the top of this list is Geometry Wars 2: Retro Evolved. This game is very simple, you are a ship and you must destroy those mean neon shapes anyway possible. The game consists of 6 modes all of which totally change the gameplay. Some you can shoot all the time, some you can only shoot when in safe zones and some you can’t shoot at all.

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08
Mar
09

Why Infinite Undiscovery is broken

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I’m sure you all know, this game has been out for several months now, and I’ve had this story steaming around my head since it happened. I for one, am a profound RPG player who has played MANY different RPG’s; I’m not claiming to be an expert, but I can tell when a game is broken and let me just say this game is broken.

infinite-undiscovery1“A new RPG from Square Enix coming out for the 360, WOW!” I exclaimed. While not having played Lost Odyssey, the only new/this generation RPG I have played was the so-so Enchanted Arms and I knew they would get better than that. So When I seen Infinite Undiscovery was coming out, I immediately threw it right into my Gamefly Queue and anxiously waited for its arrival, bad name and all.
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07
Mar
09

Noby Noby Boy Review

Trying to explain this game is quite complicated

Trying to explain this game is quite complicated

Taking one look at this game and you will instantly notice similarities between Noby Noby Boy and the major collect-a-thon that was Katamari Damacy. Noby Noby Boy is an entirely new concept centralized around the common concept of stretching. While you stretch, your dimensions get uploaded to a database which develops Girl who wants to stretch to different planets which will grant players different environments to play around in. The database doesn’t just take single dimensions; it is shared with everyone that plays the game. This is a highly simplistic game that some will enjoy but hardcore enthusiast will wish there was something more.

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07
Mar
09

Killzone 2 Impressions

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While I haven’t gotten entirely into this game yet, I’ll give out my initial impressions right now and will elaborate more when I complete the game (which will take a while because I’m freaking busy.) Having a few minor problems is not going to stop this game for being the MEGA hit it deserves.

For starters, this game is a treat for the eye. The visuals are without a doubt, the best I have ever seen on a console game. I though gears 2 looked great, Killzone looks miles better from the facial expressions to the many explosions you see throughout the game. Now, like I said, I haven’t played much of this game, but have sunk around 3 hours into the multiplayer. I haven’t seen much depth into the environments, just wreckage everywhere. The multiplayer maps look stunning but haven’t seen much variety in the different maps (I think there are 8 to start with).

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07
Mar
09

Halo Wars Review

 

halowarsboxartFor almost a decade, Halo developer Bungie Studios has been perfecting the First Person Shooting genre. Ensemble Studios was then charged with the daunting task of creating a Halo Real Time Strategy that worked on consoles and create a story without the Master Chief. Well known for the Age of Empires series on PC, Ensemble is one of the best RTS developers around. Halo games are all about bursts of action and the game is always moving forward. Ensemble has taken this formula nearly perfected by Bungie and is applying it to their own RTS strategy. 

First off Halo Wars is a beginners RTS. Hardcore RTS players are not going to get that huge tech tree and freedom over their units that they are used to. This is actually a smart move and a dumb one. Ensemble knew that most Halo players may have never touched an RTS before. They also knew that they had to make it interesting enough so that the hardcore could enjoy as well. Overall I think they succeeded in making the game very approachable to new players, despite that the gameplay just did not have enough depth to keep me wanting to go back and play it. I am not saying Halo Wars is a bad game; you just need to see it for what it is before you dive in. 

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